I live in Seattle, WA. Annually, the city receives 36 inches of rainfall--three feet, with an added 9 inches of snow. In other words, it's a rather moist place, like London, though less drippy than New York City, whose citizens get to wade through about 45 inches of precipitation a year, 28 inches of that, snow.
Is rain a stranger to Seattle? A purely meaningless, rhetorical question to be sure. But when I'm stuck in traffic on a stalled freeway, watching raindrops splash and ooze over my car hood, I'm not so sure. For some reason I simply cannot fathom, Seattlites become inexplicably freaked out every time it starts to freakin' rain. I have tried to reason this one out--perhaps they are all admiring the rain and therefore need to slow down? They left two hours early that day just for the scenic experience, for time listening to their favorite rainy day Ipod playlist? They're all from California?
I just don't know. The facts don't hold, it makes no sense. We see rain almost every day of the fall/winter months--not torrential downpour either, mostly just gentle sprinkling from a garden watering can.
Regardless, somehow rain continues to shock and amaze us. If it seems like we spend a lot of time absolutely incredulous, we do. So, since reasoning through this conundrum doesn't really reap any rewarding breakthroughs, what can we do to make it better? Come up with good safety techniques for those maniacally sinister rainy days, just waiting to catch you with your feet hanging off the bed, to snatch you unaware.
You're driving in the car, and ploop! A raindrop...
"Oh......NO. Ok, ok, don't panic, we've rehearsed this, let me just slow down, way down, and grab this little guy here...where is it? I thought I put it under my seat...ah yes! Here it is. Oh I'm gonna have to stop for a just a second and put this on without causing an accident. There we go! Bright orange lifejacket to the rescue, I'm gonna be fine..."
You're driving in the car, and plash! A puddle...
"Oh......NO. Ok, ok, don't panic, don't pan--oh my Ga--I think I just hydroplaned a little bit! Braking, braking, ooo not too much, slowly, going slow, ok, ok. Now, where did I put that...? Um...oh yes, good, here it is: my kayak paddle. That way, worst case scenario, I can make it to shore..."
You're driving in the car, and pop! A droplet explodes on your windshield...
"Oh......NO. Well, no worries, hold up, lemme just plug this into my cig lighter, I can smoke later...ok, put it up here on the dash, oh, better move my radar detector over...alright, there we go. In business! This spotlight totally solves everything--just keep raining, son, I can see no matter what. Beacon on the rocks, baby..."
You're driving in the car, and pshhhh! A car drives by and totally sprays you, marking it's territory...
"Oh......NO you didn't. Nice try, buddy, but no score, cause I'm ready. This wetsuit ain't lettin' anything in."
*Did I say driving? I meant diving...
See, now you can pull your normal routine, but feel safer in the end. Plus, you are totally, absolutely, without a doubt, prepared to drive off the end of a pier, into the Puget Sound. You might want to sneak in that SCUBA gear too though, just for convenience.
If you can't beat em,' join em.' Even assist them. For myself, I'm stealing a private helicopter tonight and just overpassing the whole business.
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